Camero? Bitchin'.

I've missed a day or so of betting college basketball, and a $372 win playing $1-2 no limit would seem to justify my absence from the hoops scene. My black rental Camero was smokin'...or still is, rather. I liked it enough that two more days of renting it is setting me back most of my poker winnings. Add a ticket or two to that, and I'd be in the red. It feels near-miraculous that I'm ticket free in the beast.

I've always considered taking sides in Chevy vs. Ford shouting matches to be exercises in moronism, and the fact that Dodge and Pontiac occasionally get thrown in to these debates only serves to underline the neanderthal appeal of these brands, but at the moment I'm pretty bullish on the '10 Camero. Of course, I haven't worked my way into a position where I can actually compare the car to the equivalent Mustangs or Challengers,* so there is really no reason to listen to me. On the other hand, while the fact that I'm willing to run my yap about it is unremarkable, I am tearing myself away from running my yap about poker and sports gambling, to give my unsolicited opinion, whatever that's worth.

I've always respected the opinions of those who have a preference for a given truck if they use their trucks for work. While Dodge seems to generally keep the lead when it comes to macho posturing, farmers and construction workers always seem to go for Fords. Similarly, I've found that mechanics tend to favor GM products, because the parts tend to be more readily available, and hence cheaper. In the end, practicality reigns over other concerns.

Well, practicallity needs to be put to one side to discuss this car. I love the engine, I love the comfort of the drivers seat, and I love the styling. In another year or two, the styling may take a hit, as more and more of these cars hit the streets. The fact that you see so many Mustangs around (even in Cuba and Korea) is probably the main reason I am down on that model of late, along with the inadequate back seats--of course, Camero back seats are hardly a selling point...nor the Challengers,' which are smaller than my apparently inaccurate memory.

Oh yeah. And the aforementioned macho posturing from Ford enthusiasts. Since GM became the automotive arm of the Obama regime, the barbaric yawp of Chevy owners has become muted, to say the least. I'll get back to this later.

I forgot to mention the handling. At first the car seemed a bit bulky, but it seems to feel lighter at higher speeds. At this point it seems to handle pretty well to me, though I must confess to previously owning an '83 Caprice Classic, and currently owning an '05 Impala, so I'm used to cars not known for their handling.

(Lest you believe I've outed myself as a Chevy enthusiast posturing as a neutral, let me say that I found the Caprice in the classifieds, and I chose the Impala over a Crown Vic because I was concerned that my wife wouldn't be able to see over the dash in the larger squad car. Though I must admit, the main thing deterring me from going for another Caprice was the daunting task of finding one with under 200,000 miles on it.)

The 3.6 liter V6 is capable of 304 horsepower, though the RPMs required for that sort of output pretty much requires you to be doing something illegal, and so egregiously that your chances of getting caught ought to be a concern. The 'Stang V6 puts out more like 210 or so, so the car that put the pony in ponycar had better be nimble indeed to make up for this power deficit. If I remember right, the bottom end Challenger puts out 250 or so, which will probably force all but the most environmentally concerned of us to move up to the 5.7 liter V8.** That car and the 6.2 liter beast are a bit too pricey for cheap bastards like myself though.

I'm always amused by how much emphasis car magazines place on handling, as if we all take our cars to the race track, and commute to work along twisty mountain roads. Maybe someday I'll blow a couple grand on BMW's driving school, but until then I probably won't quite see how all this superior handling translates to everyday commutes. Unlike accelerating around the asshole hogging the left lane, as the guy you cut off gives you the finger...or flooring it at a light, narrowly missing the pedestrian who attempted an ill-advised last second dash through the crosswalk...speaking of which...

I'm not too impressed with the bottom-end torque or the takeoff. The thing seems to accelerate faster at 40mph...or 60, or 80... On the other hand, you don't want the tires to squeal every time you take off. Sure it might sound like fun, but eventually it becomes tedious at best, obnoxious at worst. Sort of like the automotive equivalent to a Lily Thai scene. Not that Jettas squeal every time you punch the accelerator; I'm just sayin.'

The way I remember it, my mom's '01 Jetta felt quicker off the line, though this may have been relative to my expectations. Speaking of expectations, my impression of the 3.6 liter V6 has probably been influenced my all the reviews gushing about how great it is. In the end, this is the sort of thing that could get me into a CTS Caddy, it having the same engine and what not...and back seats.

These days buying a car has political implications, especially with the aforementioned government takeover of 2/3 of the domestic auto industry. One may consider that a Honda manufactured in Ohio or a Mercedes made in Alabama does more for the economy +/or American workers than a Chevy made in Canada, or a Ford made in Mexico. Those opposed to socialism may avoid GM out of principle. On the other hand, supporting domestic manufacturers may lessen their dependance on taxpayer subsidies, or eliminate their need for them altogether. If the rumor I heard was true, that GM is now profitable, and may soon buy itself back from the government, then buying a Camaro may be the most patriotic act I can imagine, given that I'd rather not go out like Pat Tillman. Or it could just mark me as another sucker, voting with my wallet for the losing side.

Since the Ford family owns the Lions, this would also be an oppertune time to buy a Ford product, given that next year's NFL season will be uncapped, opening up less competative teams to broadsides from big spenders like the Redskins and Cowboys.

Either way, I'm not in the market for another car right now, since I'm headed to Germany in the near future, where the mass transit grows on trees, so to speak. I suppose buying an American car on the tail end of my tour there, rather than shipping back an Audi or BMW would be even more patriotic than buying one now, though still less patriotic than Pat Tillman. Maybe five years from now GM won't exist. Or maybe the socialists will drive Ford out of business. Maybe the Lions will be in Los Angeles. Who knows? By that time my kid will be too big to fit in the back seat of any of these ponycars, and I'll be popping Geritol and extenZe like I'm Jimmy Johnson on a road trip to Tampa in his Depends...at least Jimmy doesn't need hair plugs.*** At least I'll have memories of a weekend back in 2010 with my black Camaro.

As a handicapper, I suppose I'm inherently a contrarian, since nobody ever got rich betting on favorites. It's the contrarian in me that makes me want to stick up for Audi vs. BMW, Hyundi vs. Honda, or Chevy vs. Ford. It's the horse trader in me that hopefully fine tunes my instincts to know when something is overbought, or oversold. It's not so much that this car is better than that car, so much as this car is better for the money. Ultimately it's about value. Like the value that PITT(+3)over west virginia represented Friday night. I'd segue the rest of the way into a review of my recent picks, but the fact that my other teams didn't cover makes it hard for me to give relevant recent examples.

*I rented a '01 Mustang back in...'01, and I found the V6 spirited, much beyond my expectation as a V8 snob. Of course nine years renders the comparison obsolete. I rented a Dodge Charger in '08 as well, though the lower end engines that you get from rental places was unimpressive enough that I don't think it makes the muscle car discussion. Nice back seats tho.'

**Coincidentally, I was eyeballing a couple of Challengers at the Chevy dealership (of all places) that is fixing my Impala's transmission, and the cars had some sort of environmental rating sticker on them. According to the sticker, the 5.7 liter V8 is twice as good for the environment as the V6 (a 4 out of 10 rather than a 2) despite the inferior gas mileage. Something to consider when Toyota recalls your Prius. For the sake of thoroughness, I really ought to see what the environmental rating is for the 6.1 liter when I go pick up my Impala. Chrysler's got to love whatever law requires them to out themselves this way.

***NASCAR Jimmy Johnson ought to sue ex-football coach Jimmy Johnson for wearing NASCAR duds in those extenZe ads on late night cable. You know Dale Jr. & Tony Stewart are cracking wise about it whenever they see him.